


Can't You See (It's Our Destiny)?

by Romansleftshoulderpad



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: (sort of), College AU, Human AU, I accidentally made Logan demiromantic but it's pretty blink and you'll miss it, M/M, Mutual Pining, Patton is mentioned like twice, idiots to lovers, started writing this because of a cavetown cover of a Randy Newman song
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:01:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25182163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Romansleftshoulderpad/pseuds/Romansleftshoulderpad
Summary: "Do you believe in fate?"It's a simple question, but one that leaves Logan thinking. Even more, he can't stop thinking about Roman's answer.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Dr. Emile Picani/Sleep | Remy Sanders
Comments: 10
Kudos: 71





	Can't You See (It's Our Destiny)?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Poisonedapples](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Poisonedapples/gifts).



> Happy anniversary to my qpp, my boyfriend, my bird aesthetic bitch, it's been so wonderful having you by my side for the last 366 days (thanks leap year) and I love forward to many more years with my best friend. I love you <3

Soulmates are bullshit, to put it lightly.    
  
No one person should be looking for a “better half” as no one person is only half a person while outside of the “correct” relationship. Logan knew his value as a human being and he knew what he believed in. Logan didn’t flirt with the idea of soulmates, but when he looked at Roman he could understand why everyone else did. 

“Do you believe in fate?” Virgil asked. “Or destiny?”

“Well, which is it?”

“What?”

“Fate  _ or _ destiny? I don’t believe that they’re the same thing.”

“Destiny then.”

Roman pondered on it for a moment, “I believe in the horse from  _ Enchanted.” _

“You’re terrible at this game.”

“In his defense,” Logan butted in as he passed through, “this is  _ not  _ the typical way to play the guessing game known as Twenty Questions.”

And Roman laughed. Logan wasn’t entirely sure why, but the smile that accompanied the laughter was… He smiled. Logan wasn’t sure how to describe what he was feeling. 

“Just answer the fucking question, dumbass,” Virgil said. 

“I think fate is the steps you take that lead to destiny,” Roman said. “I don’t think either is predetermined.”

“What an interesting theory,” Logan said, sitting down next to him. He didn’t really  _ intend  _ on sitting next to Roman. He was simply invested, is all, and that happened to be a better seat to engage in conversation than the empty chair across the room. It was a reasonable decision. And the indentation on the couch only seemed to push them a little closer together. “A word with the connotations of predetermination and you choose to define them with willful choices.”

“I mean, yeah, I guess.” He shrugged. “I just think we have more control over our lives than we believe.”

“Fascinating,” Logan whispered before he even realized the words had left his tongue. He leaned in closer, drawn to Roman like a magnet. 

—

There was something Logan didn’t understand about Remy. Well, multiple things, actually. For starters, he didn’t understand how someone could wear a leather jacket and black jeans without breaking a sweat in summer whilst Logan felt the curse of perspiration after just a quick walk across campus. 

But mostly what he didn’t understand was how someone could be so confident about  _ everything,  _ really. He was effortless at defining his own feelings and attractions and never seemed to doubt himself on anything other than essays.    
  
Remy was at a Starbucks just off of campus when Logan found him. His arm was wrapped around Emile Picani, a second year psychology major, and someone whom Logan could never figure out the exact details of Remy’s relationship with. They had always claimed to be “just friends” and “it’s one hundred percent platonic here” but that never felt like the truth. Logan had decided, despite his morbid curiosities, not to investigate. 

“Sup, babes.”

“Hello, Remy, Emile.” He gave a polite nod and sat down, taking his laptop out of his bag and connecting to the WiFi. “I hope you’re both doing well.”

Remy snorted. “It’s coffee, not an email to one of your professors.”

“I still believe in a certain amount of formality that accompanies politeness.”

“I think that’s sweet,” Emile said with a polite smile. He had a glittery blue notebook and a pink pen with a fuzzy pom pom on top; he seemed to be the only student in the entire world who kept all his notes on physical paper.

“Lo, can you email me your astronomy notes? I want to cross reference.”

“I’ll add you to the doc,” Logan replied. “Do either of you have plans for dinner tonight?”

Remy raised an eyebrow and held an inquisitive smirk. “Why do you ask?”

“Well, I know that this meeting is purely for studying and as we all have classes in the afternoon, I also know time is limited.”

“Yes, and?” he teased.

“There were some matters I wished to discuss with you that are of a more personal and casual sort. I didn’t wish to mix them with academia.”

“Okay, bitch, spill. We all know you’ll be studying again later tonight.”

“Yes, but-”

“And you don’t have any tests or projects to prepare for, or complete.”

“Well-”

_ “Also,  _ you typically dine with Patton and friends and- sure, they can go without you,  _ but-  _ if you dip suddenly to hang out with us with no warning, Patton would be very confused and worried and you hate hurting his feelings because we all know your formalities and ‘can’t be bothered to give a shit’ attitude are a terrible facade because we all know you care way too deeply but if you ever admitted that you’d probably spontaneously combust which would smell dis-gust-ang.”

Logan frowned, “I thought Emile was the psych major.”

“I am,” Emile said, cuddling up to Remy’s arm. He saw the time on the other’s computer screen and muttered a swear under his breath, “I have to get to class. It was nice seeing you two!”

“Bye, babes.”

“Farewell, Emile.”

They watched Emile calmly leave only to see him start running as soon as he was out the door. Remy couldn’t help but laugh for a moment before turning back to Logan with a smirk on his face and the desire for gossip running through him like oxygen. “Now, why don’t you skip to the part where you admit I’m right and tell me what’s bothering you?”

Logan pursed his lips in thought for a moment. What was the purpose in backing down now? He murmured, “Emile.”

“Emile?” 

“No, no, I mean... you seem so comfortable with him. How? How do you know this is what you want the two of you to be?”

“Because he’s Emile,” Remy said. He took a slow sip of coffee. “I don’t worry about the labels or anything. I worry about passing astronomy.”

“The idea of you putting effort into school genuinely surprises me.”

“Watch it. You still need my help.”

Logan sighed and closed his laptop. “Unfortunately, I do.”

“So, who is it?”

“I don’t know,” he admitted sheepishly. 

“You don’t know?” Remy raised an eyebrow. “I doubt that.”

“I know the  _ whom,  _ I just... don’t know the feeling.”

“Then ask him out.”

“That’s highly illogical.”

“Maybe so, but it’ll make you figure out your shit real fast.”

He looked down for a moment before opening his laptop. “Let’s just... let’s get back to work.”

“Whatever you say, babes.”

Logan didn’t sleep that night. He couldn’t. His mind was too awake. His body was too tired. His room was too cold. The blanket was too warm. It was awful. 

Instead he found himself sitting on a bench in the middle of campus, bundled up in a NASA hoodie and listening to music as he stared off into the void. He tried not to think about what Remy had told him earlier. He tried not to think about that ridiculous smile and how much he wanted to be the reason for that smile. He should’ve known that asking Remy for advice would have proved fruitless. Remy wasn’t  _ Logan _ . 

Logan scoffed and looked up at the stars. Why had the universe created him to be so disastrously gay?

“Hey there, stranger,” a familiar voice said. “Mind if I take a seat?”

“Go ahead,” Logan offered, taking out his headphones so as to not appear rude. 

It was hard to see in the night, only a streetlight provided them any chance to see one another, yet Roman appeared to have dark circles under his eyes and his polite smile didn’t have the same amount of energy behind it. “What’s a whimsical spirit such as yourself doing out here?”

Logan couldn’t help but chuckle. “Roman, are you tipsy right now?”

“Fuck, I  _ wish.  _ This is one hundred percent bonafide sleep deprivation, baby.”

Logan felt something in his chest. A sudden feeling, like being punched, but not necessarily a bad one. Just sudden. And confusing. “You’re almost turning into Remy.”

“No, no, no. His thing is  _ ‘babes’  _ which is weird that it's plural, because he says it while addressing one person.” Roman’s face scrunched together like he was trying to solve a Rubik's Cube for the first time. “Do you ever notice how weird it is? Like you’re just one person. Why are you multiple babes?”

Logan snorted and Roman turned to him, his face melting into a big, goofy smile. “But, no. No, no, no. You’re just baby. Like a big infant who went to college.”

“This feels like an insult to my intelligence.”

“No! No, no, I just mean like-“ His hands flew around as he tried to find the right gesture. He sighed and laid with his head on Logan’s shoulder. He murmured, “I’m tired.”

Logan’s face felt flush. He couldn’t tell if he had more answers or questions. Somehow, though, that didn’t matter. Because Roman was  _ right there  _ and he was being silly and strange and... “I guess you’re the baby now.”

Roman laughed and snuggled closer to Logan, holding onto his arm. Logan felt as though he might die of pure flusterment. Maybe, just  _ maybe _ , Remy was right. Maybe there was a way that words and labels didn’t matter and he should just ask him to do  _ something.  _

He swallowed down his pride and confusion. Maybe he was as delirious as Roman because somehow this didn’t seem so terrifying. “Hey, Roman?” he asked. But Roman didn’t respond. He was fast asleep against his side. Logan looked up to the stars and prayed for the willpower to stay awake on that bench. He wanted to make sure Roman was comfortable. He felt like he had to keep him safe. 

—-

“Twenty questions! Fate vs destiny!”

“Virgil, we discussed that last time,” Roman said with a sigh. He reached for the bowl of popcorn in the middle of the table (and while it certainly crossed Logan’s mind to reach out at the same time for some excuse to have physical contact with Roman, he eventually decided not to and simply found himself staring at the man in front of him). 

“Yeah but I asked  _ you  _ last time,” Virgil said. “Now I’m asking him.”

Logan blinked.  _ “Me?” _

“Yes,  _ you.  _ Now, fate versus destiny, go.”

“Well, I agree with Roman’s answer from last week.”

“Booo! That’s a cop out!”

“Well, I- uh- I see  _ why  _ people would believe in the ideas on a completely supernatural scale- unlike the  _ choices  _ Roman had discussed last time.”

“Interesting,” Roman murmured. He was sitting on the bed but he was leaning so far forward Logan feared he might fall onto the floor. “What’s your take on soulmates?”

Logan felt completely flustered, an occurrence he was growing rather tired of having to deal with. “I- I’m sorry?”

“Soulmates,” Roman repeated. He took another handful of popcorn and leaned back into the bed. His tank top rose up a bit, revealing the muscles under his shirt and he winked as he spoke. Logan could’ve sworn he was flustering him on purpose. “What do you think about them?”

_ They’re nothing,  _ he wanted to say. But Roman had this hopeful look on his face. He had eyes that twinkled with mischief and bright ideas and a smile that made everything else make sense. Logan didn’t want to let him down. “I guess I would say they’re created.”

“Created?” Virgil raised an eyebrow and generally seemed unimpressed. But Virgil didn’t matter.  _ Roman  _ mattered. 

He looked Roman right in the eyes. “They’re choices.”

Roman’s expression was unreadable. And, unfortunately, Logan didn’t have time to analyze it, because he quickly left the dorm without any explanation and only a plan to go back to his own dorm room and scream. 

\---

“Roman,” Logan said with a yawn. “It’s nearly two in the morning.”

“And you were up studying, weren’t you?”

“How-” another yawn “-dare you. I am a reasonable man who goes to sleep at a reasonable time every night.”

“Which would be two  _ thirty  _ in the morning,” he said with a small laugh. Logan didn’t know how it was possible but he could  _ hear  _ the smirk on the other end of the line. 

“What do you want?”

“I’m outside your dorm hall, I need you to let me in.”

“And why would I do that?”

“Because I want to talk to you.”

“We’re  _ already  _ talking.”

“Please don’t be stubborn,” Roman begged. “I want to talk face to face. I think you need a hug.”

“I don’t need a hug.”

“Maybe  _ I  _ need a hug, fucker. Did you think of that?”

Logan sighed and ran his hand through his hair. His glasses were already in their case in his bag and he didn’t feel like looking for them. “Do you need a hug, Roman?”

The line went silent for a moment, followed by a weak little, “Maybe.”

“And Virgil isn’t the one dealing with this because-?”

“Please,” he said, defeatedly. “I just need to see you. I want to talk to you. Face to face.” There was a pause. “Are you still there?”

Logan finished putting on his slippers and sighed. “You’re lucky I-”  _ No, I can’t say that.  _ “You’re lucky that I don’t have anything important in the morning.”

“Thanks, baby,” Roman sung into the phone. Logan hung up and grabbed his robe before his face caught on fire. 

One thing Roman neglected to mention was the fact that he was  _ very  _ damp from having been out in a rainstorm earlier that day. He pouted when Logan refused to hug him, but his pout was gone when he stepped inside. “Woah.”

“Okay, asshole, stop staring. I’m well aware that I’m in pajamas and not my usual attire, but-”

Roman smiled and pushed back Logan’s hair (now curly and messy from his shower). “I’ve never seen you without glasses on.”

“Yes, well, when I’m studying I don’t actually need them,” he explained. “I leave them in my- in my-” Roman’s hand was resting on his cheek now and he felt as though he might explode. His heart was racing and time seemed to slow indefinitely. He didn’t know if he wanted to run away or be kissed senseless. He didn’t know if he wanted the moment to end. “I-  _ Roman,”  _ he whispered so softly he wasn’t even sure if he had said it out loud. 

Roman tilted his head to the side and looked at Logan as a child might stare in wonder at the moon. He moved his hand slightly, cupping Logan’s cheek a bit closer to his jaw. He leaned in slowly. Slowly. He leaned in. And Logan forgot how to breathe. 

“Roman?” 

He leaned in closer, his thumb moving slowly back and forth over Logan’s bottom lip. There are times when the universe aligns so perfectly to make your heart stop yet beat wildly all at once. There are times when you can wish but times when those wishes are actually allowed to come true. Roman’s hands were soft and rough all that once. Logan couldn’t feel his heartbeat but he couldn’t feel anything else. His eyes slipped closed and he felt himself leaning into the touch. He whispered,  _ “Roman...” _

“You look cozy,” was all he said before straightening his spine and bringing his hand back down to his side.

“I- I-”

Roman laughed. “You look like a gaping fish.”

Logan wanted to scream. He wanted to scream like an absolutely feral little man in the middle of the woods, but instead of letting out a primal war cry, he asked, “Why did you come here?”

“I wanted to talk to you.”

“If you give me that answer one more time I will not hesitate to punch you in the genitals.”

“Okay, okay, fine. I wanted to talk about soulmates.”

Logan raised an eyebrow. “Really?  _ That’s  _ the pressing matter.”

“Yes, Poindexter. Now, are you going to let me in your dorm or not?”

“Well-”

“We both know your roommate is never actually there.”

Logan sighed and took Roman’s hand, trying not to think about how nicely they fit together, as they walked back to the dorm. “You know,” Logan said as they stepped inside, “I’m not letting you sit on any furniture while soaking wet.”

“And what am I supposed to do?” he teased. “Borrow your clothes?”

“Yes, that  _ is  _ what I was implying.” He let go of Roman’s hand and dug through his wardrobe. “I will request that you strip by the door.”

“Oh, my God,” Roman said through either a laugh or while choking on his own spit; it was impossible to tell from auditory cues alone. Logan pulled out a burgundy sweatshirt and a pair of Dr Who pajama bottoms and tossed them at Roman, keeping himself behind the open door to avoid crossing any boundaries. 

“You can look now,” Roman said after a brief pause. Logan shut the door and saw him. The sweatshirt was a little too big and the pants were a little too short, but there he was  _ wearing his clothes. _

“Do they feel alright?” 

“Yeah, Specs, they’re fine,” he said softly, sitting down on Logan’s bed and pulling the other down next to him. (Logan was more than a little flustered at this point.)

“Alright,” he whispered meekly. 

“Do you really think you can choose your soulmate?” he whispered. His arms were still wrapped around Logan. “What if they don’t choose you back?”

“Then they’re not your soulmate,” he said. “You can’t look at someone and decide they’re the one. You make your choices and, you know, fate runs its course.” He laid back on the small bed and Roman laid next to him. There wasn’t much space, forcing them close together, but it didn’t feel like a force. It felt like fate. “You get to know them and-“ He couldn’t stop staring at Roman’s lips. Would kissing them change the course of his fate? Would  _ not  _ kissing him change that? “Things just- I- they work out, I guess.” 

“But what if they don’t want you?”

He felt a pain in his chest. “Roman, it’s  _ okay  _ to be worried. But  _ anyone  _ would be lucky to have you in their life, esp- especially so  _ close _ and- you’re very important and- oh dear, I’m rambling again.”

“Logan,” he said softly. 

“Yes?”

Roman leaned in and kissed him. There were no fireworks or orchestras or the stars aligning, but there was Roman’s hand finding its way back to Logan’s cheek and the soft movement just after Logan processed what was happening and right before he started to kiss back. 

It wasn’t magical. It wasn’t  _ exactly _ fate or destiny. But it was  _ them.  _ It was them and a tiny dorm bed and the idea that they could shape the world so long as that world was between their mouths. 

When they pulled apart Roman laughed, which made Logan laugh, and suddenly the two were laughing and smiling, their lips still brushing together. “I love you,” Roman whispered. 

“I want you, Roman. From now until Destiny.”

Roman pulled him close, burying his head against his neck. “I love you,” he murmured again. 

“I-”

“You don’t have to say it back.”

Logan let out a relieved exhale. “Feelings are weird. And confusing.”

Roman hummed in agreement, adjusting his arms so that they wrapped around Logan’s hips. It seemed all he wanted to do was hold someone and be held. Logan ran his fingers through his hair and he let out another hum. “How do you feel when I call you ‘baby’?”

“Weird. Good. Good-Weird.” He closes his eyes. “Like laughter but without anything being funny. Like being warm without the blanket.”

“You’re a baby.”

“I could say the same about you.”

“Hey, Logan?” He let out a yawn. “I hope you’re my soulmate.”

Logan felt a weight in his chest, like a comforting sort of pressure. “I hope so too,” he whispered before losing himself to the void of sleep. 

\--- 

Roman was gone after breakfast the next morning. They each returned to their regular schedules, seeing each other between classes (and Logan found himself blushing at every little wink Roman sent his way), but other than that they were merely acquaintances. Friends without the proper time to be so. 

A week passed since their nightly meeting. Remy had requested to see Logan for dinner and so that’s where he was headed now, just outside of his dorm hall in jeans and an old NASA sweatshirt he hadn’t worn since he was seventeen, when an old friend interrupted his journey.

“Hey there, baby,” Roman hummed, wrapping his arms around Logan’s hips.

“Um, hi,” he said. “I was, uh, on my way to dinner with-”

“I know,” he said with a smirk. “Change of plans.”

“I’m sorry?” 

Roman took Logan’s hand and locked their fingers tightly before smiling back at him. “Change of plans.”

Logan, against his better judgement, followed blindly. He was trapped under Roman’s thumb (and desperate for more than just the ghost of his kiss) but somehow he didn’t mind. He found himself in the passenger seat of Roman’s car when Roman pressed a kiss to his knuckles before letting go to start the car. 

“Where are we going?” he asked.

“On an adventure.” He could see the pride in Roman’s eyes. “And also for dinner. I can't have my baby starving.” 

Logan was  _ sure  _ his face was bright red, though he couldn’t look in any of the mirrors to check. He was too enamoured by Roman. The swoop of his hair. The angle of his jaw. He had this sparkle in his eyes like he always knew something no one else did. He was everything that Logan couldn’t stop thinking about. 

They parked in front of a burger place in downtown, in the middle of a line of cars. Roman dramatically insisted on opening Logan’s door for him. (Their noses brushed when Roman bent over to unclick his seatbelt, and Logan was almost certain he had winked at him.)

“So... burgers?”

“It’s an option,” Roman said with a shrug. He offered his hand, smiling when Logan took it. “I just figured we could walk around for a bit, not worry about what the world thinks of us.”

“How long?” 

“What?”

“I know you’re a daydreamer, Roman. How long have you been planning this?”

“Planning it for a week,” he said simply. Then he slightly blushed and murmured, “Dreaming about it for seven months.” They began to walk down the sidewalk, Roman swinging their arms with pride, as they watched the sun lower into the horizon. “Do you remember when we were studying- all of us- in that Starbucks until they kicked us out to close? And then we all went to the campus library until no one was coherent.”

“Vaguely,” he confessed. “I mostly remember the pounding headache after and the knowledge that sleep deprivation was making me act like a fool.”

“You were a cute fool,” Roman said. “It was the first time I saw you not trying to be all serious and stuck up.”

“I was an idiot.”

“Shush, no, even fucked up, you’re still the smartest person in the room.”

“Then why bring it up?” Logan asked. “Surely, you mean to embarrass me.”

Roman stopped and put his free hand on Logan’s shoulder. “I’m not trying to embarrass you, Logan.”

“Then why-?”

“I’m trying to tell you that...” He took a deep breath. “That was the night I fell in love with you.”

Logan blinked. He  _ wished _ he could remember that night. He wished he could have remembered the moment when Roman’s gaze changed from casual friend to curious romantic. He wished he knew the split second that changed how Roman saw him. And, above all, he wished he could remember falling in love with Roman. Because he couldn’t remember a time when he wasn’t. 

He muttered out a quiet, “Oh.” 

“I love you, Logan.”

“I’m sorry.”

Roman looked at him in confusion. “For what?”

“Not noticing sooner. I’m sure you felt that waiting was rather annoying.”

“Never apologize for your fate.”

Logan leaned towards him. “I thought you didn’t believe in fate.”

“I don’t,” Roman said with a tiny smile. “But I believe in my destiny. And I believe that’s you.”

“You’re such a sap.”

“And you love me.”

Logan smiled and took Roman’s cheeks into his hands and kissed him.  _ Really  _ kissed him, as if kissing him would reveal The Secrets Of Roman and tell him everything he needed to know. He kissed him as if kissing him was all there was to do in the universe. He kissed him because there was nothing he wanted to do more. When he pulled away, still so close that their lips were brushing and he could feel Roman’s smile, Logan felt a sense of peace surround him. A sense that nothing else mattered as long as he was Roman’s and Roman was his. “Dear God, I do. I really do.”


End file.
